When my Summer started, it started off with learning that my mother is dying of incurable cancer…
I thought that happiness was this magical thing that was hard to grasp on too but when you did it would fill you full and you never would need to search for again. I thought that to find it I would need to first find it in others. So I spent years searching for a mate and then more years searching for it in my kids.
But I forgot to search within myself.
So when I had everything I ever wanted I realized it still wasn’t what I was searching for.
Does the heaviness of the water on my skin calm my body or am I at lost for air that I am unsure if I am truly submerge or if this is just how life should be for me now.
All I know is my lungs are screaming. My heart is pounding and life is still there.
Today I had the opportunity to teach my autistic son the value in what I call growth and strength. There are certain routines that are often in our house because of the autism we get to experience. Each morning my middle son Gunner wakes up, finds me, and tells me good morning as he does […]
I want him to let go of the rope and float with me but his feet are too heavy. They are magnetized to the ground with no leeway of release and my heart is to light for it to be tied just to earth.